It’s a “Not a Thing” Thing

  • Mandy R. Clark
  • July 23rd, 2017
  • No comments
High school relationships have always been complicated, but teenagers today make things far too complex. It's time for more simplicity.(photo by JD Wessel).

High school relationships have always been complicated, but teenagers today make things far too complex. It’s time for more simplicity.(photo by JD Wessel).

Millions of people around the world have a crush on someone right now. I don’t know this from any statistic. The information is pure logic. Whether it started at age three or during that awkward middle school phase, people develop numerous amounts of attractions over their lifetime.

Call it human nature.

Over the ages, human has come up with different ways to define a love for someone else. Levels of attraction receive varying labels. Back in my great-great-great-(too many greats)-grandfather’s day, liking someone meant that person was “sweet on” them. Personally, my favorite way to put things.

It all starts with an interest, or perhaps a ship. No, I’m not talking about some gigantic boat. Now-a-days, if teens want people to date, they “ship” them. In other words, ship is short for relationship. Then the two lovebirds begin talking…or rather, texting.

Logical? Almost. In this case, talking is not only an action, but a label. For example, I could say, “Zac Efron and I are talking!” This means I am in the pre-stages to dating. If either of us starts “communicating” with someone else, while continuing to talk to the other person, that is a red flag. Either exit the situation or gossip about the competition. Sadly, most choose the latter.

After a while of talking, the two become a thing–quite possibly the most ridiculous label of them all. The confusion can stack up high on this one. Essentially, it means the two people like one another and both know it. Although they are not in a relationship, both are considered “off limits.” Of course, this does not stop many from flirting with someone who might be in a thing. Thus, causing the quite possibly worst thing in the world: drama.

Again, things tend to turn into a contest. Gossiping, more flirting, and even social media is used as a tool to show a message.

Not all fall into this horrible pattern. Some pull through to the next level, an actual relationship. One where the person refers to the other as their boyfriend/girlfriend. However, most teens and their infatuations die off at the “thinging” stage.

It’s just too confusing, complicated, and unnecessary.

Teenagers need to turn back the clock and simplify the names. Friends or “more than friends.” Of course, there will be a transition period between the two, but do not feel the need to smack a label on it. Just say, “I like him/her.” Or even, “We like each other.”


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